Saturday, 20 January 2007

Elvis McGonagall

Elvis McGonagall is current World Poetry slam champion and no wonder -read this.

This Land's Not Your Land: A Republican Party Protest Song By A Global Village Idiot Called Backwoodsy Guthrie

This land's not your land,
this land is our land
From Columbus, Ohio to the Florida swampland
From the corporate jungle to the redneck ranchland
This land was made by Fox TV
It's bible bashin' Disneyland
It's yippee-ai eye for an eye
It's faith, family and flagGod, guns and apple pie
This land belongs to cowboys
In Stetsons, spurs 'n' suits
We're the Wall Street, Wal-Mart-Waltons
John-Boy, Jim-Bob, Jack-Boots
In the Burger Kingdom of the Stupid
Stupid is as Stupid does
Forrest Gump is President
Yee-haw! He's one of us!
e're Starbuckin' bronco Marlboro' men
We're big chief swingin' dicks
It's John Wayne's world in Washington
We're the Capitol Hillbilly hicks
We don't read books, we do action
All-American wham bam ma'am!
Schwarzenegger Uber Alles!
Gimme five! Jean Claude Van Damme!
Rambo is not a poet
The French is arty-farty funks
We hate cheese surrender chimpanzees
We hate perverts, pansies, punks'
Cos them flip-flop pinko girly boys
Don't walk
The American Way
The Dixie Chicks are Communists
SpongeBob SquarePants is gay
Hollywood is Satan's whorehouse
It's the Sodom 'n' Gomorrah
MotelRoute 666 to Tinseltown
Is the road to burnin' hell
We ride the hosanna highway
Saddle up our SUV
We got a two-ton tank 'n' a ten-gallon hatO-I-L spells victory
We're Team USA cheerleaders
Go! Go! Go! The Pentagon!Shakin' 9/11 pompoms 24/7 Armageddon?
Bring it on!We're the evangelical vandals
Shit-kick, kick, kickin' down Mecca's door
Rainin' baptist bombs on Babylon
Behold their Shock 'n' Awe!
We're pumpin'out Mohammed's diesel
Fillin' up Christ's limousine
Hallelujah Halliburton!
Glory! Glory! Gasoline!
We got no time for risin' oceans,
Ozone layers or polar bears Kyoto - is that a Japanese car?
It's gettin' hot in here - who cares?
We export Nike swoosh democracy
Handmade with Asian sweat
And golden arches of McFreedom
Built on African debt
That Chuck Darwin was a monkey boy
His science fiction's over
The Almighty made us, that's a factWay to go Jehovah!
The American Dream is born again
It's a big name brand New Deal
It's a holy roller Coca-ColaProzac Happy Meal
It's Britney Spears 'n' Bud Lite beers
It's Super-Size 'n' Super Bowl
It's Dunkin' Donuts on your mind
It's botox for your soul
We don't spare no cash for trailer trash
You gotta help yourself Jose
We wipe our ass with dollar-bills
Da-doo Enron-ron have a nice day
We're the bullet-head neo-conmen
We're the mob that franchise fear
Cat Stevens is an evil terrorist
Folk with beards ain't welcome here
We zip 'em up like chocolate oranges
Shackle, cage, interrogate
We protect Wild West values
Strip, abuse, humiliate
We don't murder unborn babies
We're pro-life NRA
We Kentucky fry deathrow deadbeats
We're electric chairmen KKK
We're the Saxon sons of Uncle Sam
Our blood's red, white 'n' blue
There ain't no black in the Stars 'n' Stripes
It don't fly for Apache or Sioux
We have loosed the fateful lightning
Of our terrible swift sword
We're the Pentecostal patriots
Kick-butt and praise The Lord!
This land's not your land, this land is our land
From the buffalo Badlands to the cotton-pickin' Dixieland
From the Dust Bowl wasteland to the Presley Graceland
This land is Jesusland! Amen!

Elvis McGonagall .For more of his poems : http://www.stetpress.co.uk/New%20writing.htm

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